Ready for School?

We're well into the first week in August, and somewhere an adult is saying, "It's too late for me to head back to school this year. I can't register and compete for classes, my kids aren't ready for me to do this, how would I work this into my job schedule, the university doesn't want to even talk to someone like me . . ." You may be familiar with the arguments against going back to school this fall. You may be repeating them to yourself on an hourly basis, in between the chores and errands. You have to start remembering the biggest truth you learned when you became the grown-up in the house: reasons are only excuses.

I think I'm in a position now to counter some of the excuses bouncing around in those doubting heads. A year ago, when I started this blog, I had no idea how school would go for me as an older adult. There were a lot of elements mitigating against my success, mostly in my own head. Despite a rocky start at Freshman Orientation, school turned out to be the best thing I ever did for myself and, I hope, the community around me.

As far as it being too late to apply, register, and get into classes, that may be true at some schools. The trick is to find some advocates who want to see you on campus. As a non-traditional student, you may find that advocate in Campus Ministry, the Women's Program, within the department that governs your major, or even in a program specifically for seniors or other non-traditional students. Go online and look.

Universities welcome and even embrace non-traditional students. We offer perspective, maturity, historical depth, and experience to what's going on in the classroom. We know what professors' office hours are for, we know the value of time, and we've developed good work habits. Professors find these qualities refreshing, and they want to help students who have clearly established their goals. They also like talking to students who recognize some of their cultural references.

Your fellow students, by the way, won't all be as young as you think. While the majority are living on campus, many are living off campus, working part- or full-time, and dealing with responsibilities you know well. They may be your best prospects for study groups. The younger students for the most part will be friendly and interesting to talk with -- and you don't have to go to all the campus events.

You may be thinking there's no money to pay tuition. Go to the finance pages on college Web sites. Talk to the finance office, too -- there are tuition discounts available at some schools. Check out grants and scholarships offered by your employer, and talk to Human Relations at work. HR departments can be an amazing resource for the non-traditional student. They can also help you work out the logistics of getting to and from class while not screwing up your job or the relationship with your colleagues. Your immediate supervisor can be a great help, too. Of the three supervisors who knew of my desire to return to college, only one actually created obstacles; oddly enough, this was at the University of Washington.

As far as your family is concerned, sometimes it can help to talk it all out. While I have no direct experience with raising children and going to school, I know it gets done. Enlist your kids in the process, so that you're all doing homework together, and share chores, so you're all working together. It sounds Utopian, but your family and you can make it happen. Your spouse is there as a part of the team, and should be supportive of your efforts to make life better for the entire family. Parents are supportive of children, and children like the chance to be supportive of their parents. You have to give each other the opportunity to help.

As a single older adult student, the main drawback in attending college is the isolation. Studying requires a lot of focused time for reading and writing. Between classes, work, and studying, you can find that your social life goes to zero. This can be painful at times; often I get to the end of a day of concentrated work and wish someone was there to talk with. The problem is that by that point the fatigue is so heavy that even going out for coffee is impossible. Luckily, at that point I'm ready to go to sleep. Additionally, I have a lot of friends online who are glad to exchange short notes -- that really helps!

You may have more reasons and doubts about returning to school this fall or in January. Send me a note and maybe I can make some suggestions. The point is, you can do this -- you just have to figure out the way that works for you.