Something in the Academic Air

After all these months, several of my fellow students are still mulling over what they want to do with their lives. While one is heading for pharmacy school, another is headed off to naturopathy training, and the best writing partner ever is signed up for physical therapy school, a lot of folks still are gathering brochures, wandering through Web sites, and talking to people in various industries.

It must be catching. As I may have said in previous posts, I began school thinking I had it all figured out: get the BA in English, get the MA in teaching English as a foreign language, get the PhD in something useful, and look for a job at a small university. Teach a lot, publish academic research articles as neccessary, repeat. It was a lovely plan. It's just not the right one -- or not totally the right one.

Here we are, in the summer before my senior year (does my age make me a double senior?), at the moment I should be planning when to take the GRE and gathering grad school applications, and I'm still not sure what I want to be when I finally, finally grow up.

Despite the legendary blankness of my memory when it comes to remembering names of philosophers and details of philosophical theories and arguments, I am most totally absorbed by bioethics. But, most grad schools offering advanced degrees in the field require that one be concurrently enrolled in an MD or MNS program. One program might take me, but it's on the other side of the country.

I could just take the BA and go back to writing science and research news releases for a university somewhere -- Kansas State is hiring -- but do I want to settle for what I used to do? The same argument militates against going back to broadcast journalism. And so does my gut.

A good friend has advised that I spend the weekend reflecting and praying about this. Since I choke up every time I think about taking a final step in one direction or another, that seems like a good idea.

If you'd like to comment or advise, please send me a note. I had no idea that indecisiveness was catching.

Think, Think, Think

This is not the right moment in the semester to make a serious decision. Today I had an exam, followed by a group presentation; I need to create an argumentative thesis for the presentation to the bioethics class; about 180 pages of reading are due tomorrow; a short paper is due Thursday; two more long papers are due on the sixth . . . you get the idea. Being this deep into the semester is like being depressed: make no permanent decisions until things return to normal, whatever that may be.
The current problem is this: I may not be able to do what I want to do, once I work my way through the bachelor's degree. if I decide to get a master's in bioethics, I'm pretty much limited to one school on the east coast. Their master's program doesn't require concurrent enrollment in an M.D. or R.N. program. A school in Europe was suggested, but I don't have the Latin, calculus, and who knows what that are typical of anyone graduating from a European baccalaureate program.
So, maybe no graduate degree in bioethics. I could go back to plan A, which is to get a master's and maybe a doctorate in some kind of English program, so I can teach English as a second language on the college level. How many colleges hire brand new Ph.D.s who are as thoroughly seasoned as I will be by the time I'm ready to look for a job?
This is pretty discouraging. My dream is to teach at the college level, and it's looking unlikely. This could be depressing.
On the other hand, the presentation this afternoon went well. We got the rest of the class to participate, including one young woman whose voice I have never heard before. The hour went by quickly, and the professors didn't look cranky afterward, so I'd say we did well.
At this point, no decisions on what to do next, besides registering for fall semester, just in case that's the right thing to do.